Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Under Pressure

My daughter, I am going to call her Ky in my blog, is 11. She currently stand 5"41/2' (to her the half is very important) making her ALMOST (my mother is not happy about this little fact) as tall as her grandmother. She has always loved sports and has been good at them, just never great. That is until she found volleyball at the end of third grade. She is not the star of the team but she more than holds her own and she loves it. So much so that volleyball has pretty much become our life.

She has dreams of college ball. She really even has dreams of the Olympics one day. I have dreams of winning the lottery to pay for all of the lessons and club seasons its going to take to get her there. The sport of volleyball has become just as competitive and popular in North Texas as soccer and football. When I was her age girls did not pick up a volleyball for the first time until Jr. High or High School Tryouts and if they were lucky they had enough girl show up to cut one or two. The Jr Highs around this area have so many girls show up for try outs that you could make two or three teams and still have to cut some. Then there are the clubs- where you pay to play and have to try out. If you are really good you get the honor of forking over $2500 to $3200 a season (luckily there is only one season a year). And if your team is really good and makes it to Nationals add another $2000 to $2500 to that figure. Yet if you want to ensure you spot on a JR High or High school team and are not just naturally fabulous at the game this is what it takes. Back to that dream of playing in college that my wonderful Ky has- that means making it on a National level team her JR and SR years of high school.

Here is where the pressure comes in. Volleyball has been great for my daughter. Although I never would have classified her as obese she did carry a few extra pounds before she started playing. Not anymore. She has more self confidence since she started playing and she really has learned a lot about team work. I have more than got my money's worth and would not regret a thing if she turned to me tomorrow and never wanted to touch a volleyball again. I am starting to feel a lot of pressure about club tryouts - which are not even until November. Money is always an issue in our house- $50 per try out plus a $500 to $700 deposit if she makes a team is really weighing on me. Not to mention the decision on which teams to try out for. Or to start our own team with our Rec girls. An awesome idea if we can find the right coach, practice facilities and the right club to sign up through. Huge weight off of my shoulders money wise. But what is the best decision in the long run for her "game".

Why with an 11 year old am I already having to make decisions that really may shape the rest of her life? This is insane. WHY!WHY!WHY!

The thing that I hate the most is that I keep wanting to push her. I try very hard not to, I really do just want her to be a kid for as long as she can be. But in the back of my mind I am constantly thinking- how many privates should we be doing over the summer, do we need to add in Pilate's and yoga, do we need to go ahead and start doing plyometrics. How many camps do we need to sign up for. Finding the right balance has almost driven me insane. How much practice is she doing at home. AUGHGHGGH.

I will admit- I love this game. I love to watch her play. I do not want to wake up one morning and realize that she is doing this all for me. I ask her ever time we go to sign up for another session - is this really what you want to do. I hope that is enough.

I am finding this parenting thing to be very stressful.


  1. Unfortunately it's one of those things where you can only do what you can do. You're already supporting her and helping her a lot, and I'm sure that's a HUGE thing for her :)

  2. While I am not yet a parent, I understand the significance of volleyball to your child, both as "fun" and as something that has helped her excel in other areas (teamwork, confidence, health). Kudos to you for caring so much! Say a prayer and I'm sure it will all work out :)

  3. Sports are so much fun and I am a firm believer in "keep them busy and you'll keep them out of trouble". As long as you can enjoy watching her, go and watch.

    I am starting my 2nd round with my grandson.

    Love watching them play sports!